When there are five of you sharing one bathroom, many conversations and arguments are geared around the toilet. These are the things I hear on a regular basis:
“Can I pee in the tub because I can’t hold it anymore!?!”
“Kaleb, did you pee on the seat?”
“Moooommmmmmm tell him to hurry up!”
“Mooooommmmmmmmmmmmmm tell him he can’t use his tablet while he’s pooping”
“Why do you have to poop when I’m trying to brush my teeth?”
“Mom tell him he can’t poop while I’m in the bath”
“Mom, is this poop on the seat?”
“WHO POOPED ON THE SEAT!?!?” (Nobody ever answers this question)
“Mom tell her she can’t straighten her hair when I’m pooping”
“Mom, tell her I can get in the bath with her”
“Tell her to unlock the door I have to brush my teeth!”
“I didn’t do that”
I miss having my own bathroom, a lot. I enjoy being able to lock the door and get in the bath and relax after a day of work and kids. I miss being able to get in the shower without someone flushing the toilet and the water going cold.
I swear my children will wait. The bathroom can be free for hours, nobody using it, and then as soon as I walk in, it’s like they all get a notification to their brains to say “mom just walked in the bathroom, time to go take a poop”. It never fails, I hardly ever get anytime in there by myself. I have become accustomed to sitting and feeling the lovely feel of pee on the back of my legs. I don’t even flinch anymore. It is what it is.
One day I will have my bathroom that is just mine. That I can lock and use all by myself. And although I know I will miss the closeness we share in this little house, I will be more then ok to shower without smelling my child’s poop, or getting to sit on a dry seat!